Now I’ve been collecting beard oils for a long time now.
I’ve reviewed my fair share of them.
If you said to me:
Bobert, what is the one thing you have learned from this experience? What is the one nugget of crystal wisdom you would impart to us?
Then the answer would unwaveringly be:
And I don’t take making bold statements like that lightly.
Read on to find out what I have discovered.
Coconuts are one of the most wonderful things that God has ever provided for us!
In a natural world, we would all be scampering around on desert islands, enjoying ourselves and eating nothing but fresh fish and fresh coconuts!
The humble coconut has been overlooked for decades, yet in the last few years has seen a massive resurgence in its popularity and a recognition of the many invaluable characteristics that it possesses.
Not only is the flesh of the coconut an incredibly nutritious food and the water an amazingly nourishing drink, but the oil that can be extracted from the flesh is practically a magic elixir.
Societies around the world whose diet consists of 70% coconuts are some of the healthiest people on the planet!
So, is coconut oil good for your beard?
Damn straight it is!
So let’s have a look at exactly what happens when you smother this incredible natural goodness in your facial hair.
I am normally a staunch advocate of scientific method when I conduct my beard oil experiments, however I decided to conduct a small anecdotal “shine test” using my favorite coconut beard oil.
I applied the oil twice a day, for two days.
At the end of the second day, my beard was glowing.
I am not exaggerating much when I say I actually received 3 unsolicited comments about how awesome my beard was looking after going through this “shine test”!
As great as beard oils based on other carrier oils such as Jojoba and Argan oil are, they simply don’t measure up to coconut oil when it comes to creating a charasmatic, lustrous sheen.
I have talked about the need for really tiny lipid molecules before.
Coconut oil in beard hair will penetrate right to the very centre of the cortex!
This is something that has been proven again and again via scientific study.
Check out this exert which really says it all (italicized comments are my highlights):
This study has firmly established the superiority of the protective effect of coconut oil on hair damage in grooming processes when it is used as a pre-wash conditioner as compared to mineral oil and other vegetable oils such as sunflower oil. It not only has a protective effect on undamaged hair but also on chemically treated hair, UV-treated hair, and hair treated with boiling water (i.e., hair in water at 100øC for 2 hr). The ability of coconut oil to penetrate into hair cuticle and cortex seems to be responsible for this effect.
That basically means that coconut oil is so nourishing that it can restore boiled hair.
I personally can’t imagine anything much worse than boiled hair, so coconut oil gets my vote!
In most scented beard oil, the tones of the carrier oils are dominated by whatever essential oils are contained in the mixture.
However, when you choose a beard oil with a coconut oil base you get an underlying warm, natural, coconutty aroma.
Coconut oil has some genuinely unbelievable properties. It is actually scientifically considered an antimicrobial, which means it kills or inhibits the growth of microbes!
That means bacteria!
So, the remains of your chewed up cheese sandwich, or last night’s curry – will have much less chance of festering and becoming toxic in your beard when you apply coconut oil in your facial hair.
In fact, the effect is so pronounced, coconut oil has even been used to heal wounds!
The reason for this is that coconut oil is one of nature’s densest sources of lauric acid.
In fact, it is the densest source outside of human breast milk!
So, the thing about coconut oil is that it is solid at room temperature.
Clearly an issue for a beard oil – especially in colder climates!
Can you imagine going about your day with hard clumps of coconut oil stuck in your beard?
No, Bobert Brush can’t either.
Luckily, there is a solution.
Beard oil artisans use something known as ‘fractionated coconut oil’ in their recipes.
The process of fractionisation uses hydrolysis and steam distillation to turn the coconut oil into a liquid with a longer shelf life. I know you are thinking this sounds bad, but it’s not!
Fractionated coconut oil is the perfect carrier oil because it actually mixes well with other oils and carries them into the skin!
Now there seems to be some hype out there on the Internet about coconut oil beard growth.
Many of these ‘how to grow a beard’ guides preach that applying various kinds of oil – including coconut oil – to your beard, will increase the rate or coverage of your beard growth.
Bobert Brush is going to debunk these coconut oil beard growth myths now as bullshit.
As wonderful as coconut oil for facial hair might be, no kind of oil will actually enhance beard hair growth.
Beard hair growth is driven by your hormonal system and in particular testosterone. The only way to increase beard hair growth is to increase your testosterone.
So, you’re convinced that coconut oil for beards is a good thing. Now you’re looking for a coconut beard oil that will really hit the mark.
Check out this highly prized and strongly recommended specimen from Papa Dubs:
You can see my full review here, or click the image below to see the product reviews on Etsy.
My intellectual clarity increased exponentially and I momentarily understood the secrets of ancient Egyptian technology and glimpsed the lives and souls of the next 17 generations of my family. In the very same moment I existing as a savage, machete-carrying native of a coconut-palm laden paradise, with the raw strength – though not quite the desire – to tear his enemies’ limbs from their sockets at his will.